Murderer
Failed. My attempts to
save the thought
Frantically
digging through the walls of mind
Battles that
have been brutishly fought
In blood, the
truce is finally signed.
Knife rusted in caustic
memories
Slaughters remainders of my callous heart--
The
heart,
Bent
on betraying me once more
The
old Judas,
Murderer!
Whore!!!
Waiting for the worst
possible moment
To flee the battle and
beat no more.
Don’t
bother loving me, don’t waste your talents
Don’t
let your hair touch
my lips
hung to the floor.
The
most beautiful scent that I can remember
Was scent of you that I once wore.
Earthquakes
creating new islands rumble
Night
stranglers whisper to those long dead
Shell
of my heart, I let you crumble
All
the love in you,
Already
bled.
How
worthy now are all of my words?
Eternally damned, mind
foams with contempt
With
slush of knowledge I shielded my ruins
But
from destruction was not exempt.
I
still remember, and will forever
Unto
the tiniest detail
None
shall escape this torture chamber
There
are no exits from this cold jail.
Each
one will further crucify soul
With dull nails of fleeting memory
And
each one curse it to roam forever
In
darkness
Even
after all is but history.
Which
idols to put up on pedestals now?
Icons
of old age have long been buried.
In
iron darkness what’s there to vow?
In
front of whom children are to be married?
I’m
asking, Father, beside your grave stone
You
squandered your time in murderous rage
No one,
no longer sits on that damned throne
Of war, and avoidance
we’ve
entered the age.
Conscious
of it, I can’t help but wonder
If
imitation is the biggest compliment of all.
I’ll
reason.
I’ll
try it.
And just before its flag I
hang on the wall
I’ll smash it, so not to
spit in my face.
So no
one can see me
Nor
recognize
Of the old faker, similarity
or trace.
Wake
up! Pry open those soulless eyes.
You
still don’t realize that the very thing hurting
With
flood,
With
Famine
And
all the sweet lies
Are
the best that impotent father could muster.
In
all the glory he was falsley asserting.
Look
at the silly bewildered beasts
Of
his dim-witted, backward “creation”
All
the mistakes and the incompetence
Gave
us “the people”
And
gave us “nations”
To whom do you belong? To whom would you pray?
Just
to be called one of their own?
With
hammers,
With
blood
And tears of all victims
The seeds of new era
here must be sown.
To
blossom in the bloodiest sunrise
To color the oceans with fear of new -
From
your own fear and nightmarish mind
It
rises,
Squeezes,
Slowly strangles
All
guards of The Old, screaming “The Coup!!!”
The
fingers of steel cannot just stop
Nor
let go easily of my dried-out throat
To
wake up,
Cheat,
And
come out on top
To
laugh at God’s face
And
all He wrote.
You
mumble, grimace, you holy madman
Your
son has drawn the sword from its sheath.
Don’t turn, I am only few steps behind you.
Long is the fall to darkness beneath.
Cut of the blade makes the Heavens cry
It’s my own doing, making
me weep
The masses mourning the death of the sky
Weeds
of the old faith
Time is to reap.
Mama,
Your
son has become the murderer of creation.
Mama,
He
chained the God to his feet.
Mama,
Not for a moment his
hand did tremble.
Mama,
Is
that the destiny that he must meet?
Serene,
standing
On
battle bruised cloud
A child after the
murderous act.
Smiling
at my own shadow
Angry.
Loud.
At
peace with odds against me stacked.
For a moment
or two
I'll allow the world
See what it sorely, for
ages, lacked.
Then
I will call out with voice of thunder
Look
at me!!!
Judgment now stands above.
The edge of new sunrise
will hide the old blunder.
I bring you no peace.
I bring no love.
Cry
to no end, marvel the failures
Eternally
we have been suffering for.
Then settle,
hear me.
Feel
your skin crawl.
Listen
up!
I am coming
forth.
2015
